These the days that are tough for dads. When your babies start to grow up. And start to shine in ways that you don't expect. There's a really really long story that centers around the apple of my eye, my 7-year old daughter Sarah...or Sarah Bearah as I affectionately started calling her. The story starts when she was born 2 months premature and only weighed just under 3 pounds, and spent the first month of her life in the NICU at St. Jude's in Fullerton. And how I wasn't even allowed to touch her for the first 2 weeks of her life unless I had gloves on. And how she had a brain bleed during her first week of life that almost necessitated brain surgery. And how instead of learning how to change her diapers and enjoy her at home, I had to do it everyday visiting a hospital. It was very very trying time. To say the least. Watching my 3 pound premature baby girl was enough to turn this big louse of a man into a complete and utter mass of whimpering.
Fast forward to today...she's 7 years old...she's in 2nd grade. She plays piano, sometimes scaring the crap out of me because she'll say "Hey daddy, does this sound ok?" and I look up, and she's playing 2 hand piano stuff LOOKING AT ME AND NOT THE KEYBOARD!!! HELLO!!!!!!!!!!! You're 7!!! Knock off this Liberace showing off crap!! LOL!!! She's bright, she's intelligent, she's a sarcastic sass at times (which really chaps my hide because she's JUST like her mom!! Grrrrrr!!), she's unbelievably beautiful, and she's been through a ringer to start her life.
I got a call this morning from The Warden, telling me that today was the first time she was going to take the bus to school instead of mom schlepping her around. The Brea Unified School District finally decided to add a bus stop for us canyon dwellers, and today was the first day of service. As The Warden put it--"Sarah was so excited today. She ate breakfast with great speed, and got ready. And then, from the dining room she yelled, 'They're here, they're coming!!' And I told her go outside and wait for them!" Them being the neighborhood kids traveling in a "pack" to go to the bus stop.
We're really protective of Sarah. Not obnoxiously--we don't hover. But we are pretty careful about keeping an eye on her, keeping her safe, setting rules pretty clearly, having expectations, blah blah blah. So, this was a MAJOR step towards one, letting her have a more freedom, and two, LETTING GO A BIT. As my friend back in Illinois says, "TIME TO CUT THE UMBILICAL CORD!!" What he means is that sometimes as parents you just have to let go, and let life happen. Today--because I'm HERE at the OCFA, I missed this little milestone of letting her go. Bittersweet to say the least, but ultimately, happy for my "little girl". Apparently The Pack showed up, and she ran outside with her bookbag and lunch, and "got in line" with everyone and took off up the street to the bus stop. The Warden had to choke up back a tear (and so did I as she was telling me about this) and stifle the need to "supervise" the kids as they walked down the street. And the part that really hits me--where if you're not a dad you may not "get it"--but the part that really hit me was when my wife said, "And you should have seen her face. She was soooo proud of herself. She had that 'lips clamped smile' and she was looking out of the side of her eyes at me as she walked away." I know that sounds weird, but I know my daughter. And I know inside, she was a mix of elation that she was with "her people", and being a "grown up" by taking off to go catch a bus, but at the same time, it's hard not to think that maybe she was a tad bit scared. And that she was just glancing to make sure mom was still there.
Damn kids. They make my eyes leak.
Well done daughter.
Well done.
Monday, October 20, 2008
Friday, October 17, 2008
I HAVE THE KONK!!!!!!!!!!
Recently, it was related to me by a good friend at work that his wife was "worried" about me, and how I've recently become "all political". Hardly ALL political, but yes, I've reached a point of frustration with our government SERVANTS that has pretty much bordered on nuclear meltdown. If you look on my Facebook page, I'm a tried and true Libertarian, something I've joked about on this very blog as something I didn't even KNOW until I "took the political party test". I wasn't slightly, or to the right or left, of Libertarian. Oh no...I was pretty much living in the lower colon of Ron Paul-level of libertarian. And I really think it comes down to my ever-increasing lack of confidence (to say the least) on anyone within politics (no offense to my good friend Jon) being "honest". It simply doesn't exist. Yet...we as a society JOKE about it. Cartoons, and editorials, and blogs, and "shruggin' the shoulders whaddya gonna do" attitudes abound with this "acceptance" of really, what I refer to as, on the VERY basic level of human interaction....DISHONESTY.
This recent "rescue plan" for the economy, this 750 BILLION dollar exercise of throwing a Big Gulp full of water on a raging forest fire, is a joke? WHY!?!?!? Because what we DON'T know about it--and that's the "earmarks" that are part of it. Not even about the fruitlessness of this "rescue", it's about people in politics getting what they WANT for THEM. Really. That's the BOTTOM line. So I'm sick of it. Really. Sick of it.
Not to mention this campaign. There was about 5 minutes of the presidential debate that I listened to before I seriously got nauseaous. There was NOTHING said--it was finger pointing. It was worthless. It meant NOTHING. Empty words. Empty promises. BY BOTH of these guys. And it's in a long line of previous empty promises.
We don't...oh sorry...I DON'T trust my government anymore. I simply don't. We as a people have let things slip away from black and white, right and wrong, into moral ambiguity, relative ethics, lies, corruption...oh the list goes on. But that's human nature, Turner...it's too be expected. I say it's NOT to be expected. I EXPECT leaders to hold themselves to a higher standard. I EXPECT that the good of the citizens of this country are FIRST AND FOREMOST in the minds of those that we pay OUT OF OUR ASSES IN TAXES FOR IN GOVERNMENT. But it's just not so.
So...that's why I've become "political". I'm not jumping on any bandwagon and saying "Vote for (insert name)" because no one is worthy. True, I've dug a little deeper and apparently Obama has some good ideas that if I were to be completely honest, I tend to think he may have an edge over McCain in (and I'm speaking directly about his tax plan). But I stop myself RIGHT THERE--because it's probably NOT going to happen. Maybe it's because it's a lie from Obama, or maybe "something will happen" and the 95% of us that are supposed to get a tax break under him won't enjoy it. So I say vote for no one. What does it matter?
But you wanna know something?? Here's where I think I have found, at least in this clip, my voice. I love Jon Stewart. I think he's a great talent, and he says it like it is. Watch this clip, and just feel behind the comedy the frustration that he speaks to...and of. That's me. You can put my face on Stewart's body, and I'd say the same damn thing.
But I'm louder. :-) Enjoy...and then I'll see you later...as our country continues to sink to new lows...
This recent "rescue plan" for the economy, this 750 BILLION dollar exercise of throwing a Big Gulp full of water on a raging forest fire, is a joke? WHY!?!?!? Because what we DON'T know about it--and that's the "earmarks" that are part of it. Not even about the fruitlessness of this "rescue", it's about people in politics getting what they WANT for THEM. Really. That's the BOTTOM line. So I'm sick of it. Really. Sick of it.
Not to mention this campaign. There was about 5 minutes of the presidential debate that I listened to before I seriously got nauseaous. There was NOTHING said--it was finger pointing. It was worthless. It meant NOTHING. Empty words. Empty promises. BY BOTH of these guys. And it's in a long line of previous empty promises.
We don't...oh sorry...I DON'T trust my government anymore. I simply don't. We as a people have let things slip away from black and white, right and wrong, into moral ambiguity, relative ethics, lies, corruption...oh the list goes on. But that's human nature, Turner...it's too be expected. I say it's NOT to be expected. I EXPECT leaders to hold themselves to a higher standard. I EXPECT that the good of the citizens of this country are FIRST AND FOREMOST in the minds of those that we pay OUT OF OUR ASSES IN TAXES FOR IN GOVERNMENT. But it's just not so.
So...that's why I've become "political". I'm not jumping on any bandwagon and saying "Vote for (insert name)" because no one is worthy. True, I've dug a little deeper and apparently Obama has some good ideas that if I were to be completely honest, I tend to think he may have an edge over McCain in (and I'm speaking directly about his tax plan). But I stop myself RIGHT THERE--because it's probably NOT going to happen. Maybe it's because it's a lie from Obama, or maybe "something will happen" and the 95% of us that are supposed to get a tax break under him won't enjoy it. So I say vote for no one. What does it matter?
But you wanna know something?? Here's where I think I have found, at least in this clip, my voice. I love Jon Stewart. I think he's a great talent, and he says it like it is. Watch this clip, and just feel behind the comedy the frustration that he speaks to...and of. That's me. You can put my face on Stewart's body, and I'd say the same damn thing.
But I'm louder. :-) Enjoy...and then I'll see you later...as our country continues to sink to new lows...
Thursday, October 16, 2008
...annnnnnnnnd away we go!!!
Marching band season is in full swing! The "fire season" is in full swing! And alllllllllllll is CRAZY!!
Hello all...if you know me on Facebook, than you know that I am spending in inordinate amount of time over there kabbitzing and meeting people and re-meeting old friends. It's really been quite cool. I've also linked this blog--The Observations of the H--with "My Notes" over in Facebook, so whatever I type here appears there. SO HI THERE!! I'm here. Or something.
Let's see...what can I talk about today?
Well, I just had lunch and I'm sitting down staring at my desk and several "to do" things on my list. One thing of interest was that on Friday of last week and then again this past Tuesday, I taught 4 classes in personal emergency preparedness to some employees of State Farm Insurance down in Irvine. My sister in law sort of put it together through their "employee betterment" classes they do where outside speakers come in and talk about all kinds of fun stuff--like will planning, financial planning, investing, computers, how to program your iPod, etc, etc. This was the first time that I officially taught a class on emergency preparedness, and outside of the fact that I was so nervous I could barely see straight, I actually did an ok job. Apparently they liked me. I'm going back in the spring.
As you are aware, the fire season is well upon us and this is always a troublesome time of year for me. My two loves in life--the fire service and the marching arts--sometimes come into conflict regarding my schedule. Bad. I hate that. So between my judging and announcing assignments this fall, as well as my requirement that if something bad happens at the fire department (like a big brush fire), I'm expected to drop whatever I'm doing and be at work, or STAY at work or whatever the case is. So...we'll see how this season goes.
And yes, the ever-loving marching band season is in full swing. My group in Illinois is doing PHENOMENALLY well, to the point that the director is "concerned" that they're getting way too big headed out there. Maybe I should fly back and explain the facts of life to them. One of my other groups out here just competed last weekend and won their class. COOOOOOOOOOOL!! Great way to start the season. But EVERY weekend except for Thanksgiving weekend, I'm doing SOMETHING somewhere. Amazing.
That's it...quite boring I admit...but it is what it is (dang it Thom...that's all I say anymore--and now EVERYONE at work is saying it....dang it!!!).
Now...get outta here!
Hello all...if you know me on Facebook, than you know that I am spending in inordinate amount of time over there kabbitzing and meeting people and re-meeting old friends. It's really been quite cool. I've also linked this blog--The Observations of the H--with "My Notes" over in Facebook, so whatever I type here appears there. SO HI THERE!! I'm here. Or something.
Let's see...what can I talk about today?
Well, I just had lunch and I'm sitting down staring at my desk and several "to do" things on my list. One thing of interest was that on Friday of last week and then again this past Tuesday, I taught 4 classes in personal emergency preparedness to some employees of State Farm Insurance down in Irvine. My sister in law sort of put it together through their "employee betterment" classes they do where outside speakers come in and talk about all kinds of fun stuff--like will planning, financial planning, investing, computers, how to program your iPod, etc, etc. This was the first time that I officially taught a class on emergency preparedness, and outside of the fact that I was so nervous I could barely see straight, I actually did an ok job. Apparently they liked me. I'm going back in the spring.
As you are aware, the fire season is well upon us and this is always a troublesome time of year for me. My two loves in life--the fire service and the marching arts--sometimes come into conflict regarding my schedule. Bad. I hate that. So between my judging and announcing assignments this fall, as well as my requirement that if something bad happens at the fire department (like a big brush fire), I'm expected to drop whatever I'm doing and be at work, or STAY at work or whatever the case is. So...we'll see how this season goes.
And yes, the ever-loving marching band season is in full swing. My group in Illinois is doing PHENOMENALLY well, to the point that the director is "concerned" that they're getting way too big headed out there. Maybe I should fly back and explain the facts of life to them. One of my other groups out here just competed last weekend and won their class. COOOOOOOOOOOL!! Great way to start the season. But EVERY weekend except for Thanksgiving weekend, I'm doing SOMETHING somewhere. Amazing.
That's it...quite boring I admit...but it is what it is (dang it Thom...that's all I say anymore--and now EVERYONE at work is saying it....dang it!!!).
Now...get outta here!
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